STARDELICIOUS

Blue Steel

I have one question. Who the hell watches Gossip Girl anymore ever?? I know all us bloggers report that crapfest being passed off as a tv show, but I don’t know a single person, female or gay, that watches it.

Here’s Chace Crawford, center, with alleged boytoy Ed Westwick, right. The one on the left (no one really cares about him so why memorize another name) and Chace have that hot sweaty wet look that only comes after bumping boypussie. And poor Ed, always the odd man out in the threesome, looks pissed. Gay!

P.S. Is it me, or does Ed Westwick look a little, um, differently abled??

Did he eat himself to death??

Or take a big black schlong that was too big??

I have received countless emails about Eminem being dead. I have received everything from “He died in a fatal car accident” to “He overdosed on Ambien” (hardcore Em went to rehab for sleep-aid Ambien) to “He died in a fatal car accident while asleep at the wheel on Ambien”.

Titillated, I dug deeper. I saw that this is a fiery hot story on the internets and a hot google search. So I looked for any credible sources. And, alas, just like with my Is Criss Angel Dead?? post, this one proves to be a bust. Sadly.

It’s all a hoax generated by this copycat YahooNews Page that does look scarily accurate save the shitty newscopy. Teases! I was hoping ex-wife Kim finally got her revenge gangstah style. I kid. For you urban legend believers/conspiracy theoriest, Eminem’s official site released this statement:

Despite sick-minded ne’er do-well attempts to create a state of panic in this grand country by virtue of a well-crafted CNN.com fake news story prank, our beloved Slim Shady is alive and well,” the statement reads. “Marshall is alive and at home with his family for the holidays in Detroit. And he wishes all of you shady holidays and a dirty new year.”

Thank God, because honestly I can’t take a million posthumous record releases from Em ala Tupac. The world can breathe a gargantuan sigh of relief.

Clay Aiken opens up in the latest issue of People about being gay. On the decision to come out…

“It was the first decision I made as a father,” Aiken, 29, tells the upcoming issue of PEOPLE, on newsstands Friday. “I cannot raise a child to lie or to hide things. I wasn’t raised that way, and I’m not going to raise a child to do that.”

More like the career is in the shitter like every other American Idol except Carrie Underwood…

He adds that he hopes his fans “know that I’ve never intended to lie to anybody at all. … But if they leave, I don’t want them to leave hating me.”

I hated you well before this. On coming out to Mom, Faye…

The born-again Christian singer also reveals how he told his mother Faye he’s gay four years ago. After dropping off his younger brother Brett, who was being deployed to Iraq, at Camp Lejeune, “I started crying in the car,” Aiken remembers. “It was dark. I was sitting there, thinking to myself. I don’t know why I started thinking about it … I just started bawling. She made me pull over the car and it just came out.”
So what was his mom’s reaction? “She started crying. She was obviously somewhat stunned.

She must have ridden the short bus like the kids Clay used to teach before he became an international sex symbol. He’s really not even her biological son. He’s really the bastard lovechild of Elton John & Billy Jean King…

Scary isn’t it?? Gingervitis must be cross-linked genetically with GAY.

Simon Cowell, genius that he is, chimed in,

Wow, that’s a shock. It’s like being told Santa Claus isn’t real — unbelievable. … Good for him. I don’t think anyone cares. Let’s face it. It’s 2008. You know, who cares?

God, I love him.

Clay Aiken has officially come out. I know, try to contain yourself. Next you’ll tell me that Gayle is Oprah’s wife and Tom Cruise likes to play fireman and slide down poles. I’m going to have to buy this damn magazine this week.

Get me a vibedefibrolator because I am about to go into cardiac arrest!! All those lonely Saturday nights that I spent getting my manties moist over his suave cooing and imagining his fiery top box were a waste! Everywhere Claymates are crying into their Duncan Hines icing and putting on their Tweety Bird t-shirts to shop the pain away. Walmart can be the one store to expect stellar sales this month.

Pure sex. We’ll live on in my memories…

…cuz they’ve got plenty of Mayonnaise

Director Gus van Sant sat down with dreamboat James Franco to talk about his latest film, “Milk”, where he portrays Sean Penn’s gay lover, complete with 70s porn stache. Anyway, apparently nymphette Zac Efron was up for a part. Sadly, not as a third gay lover, but as a pizza boy,

JF: Then I think you said that you had tried to get Zac for a small role in Milk.

GVS: Yeah. The pizza guy. He never had time.

JF: Right. So then when I saw him at the MTV Movie Awards, I was like, “Hey man Good to meet you, Zac. I really like the movie, and I just workd with Gus, and he tried to get you in the movie.” And Zac was like, “Yeah, yeah. It just didn’t work out.” And I was like, “Well you should really do a movie with Gus. I think it would be a good contrast to your other stuff.” He’s like, “Yeah, maybe.” And then I was walking away to go back to my seat, and he tapped me on the shoulder and said, “We should do it together, man.” And he, like, gave me a high five. He was really the nicest guy.

GVS: Yeah. He is really nice. We should all do a Judd Apatow movie. You and Zac and me.

JF: Yeah. You should do a movie that Judd produces, and we’ll do it with Zac. What do you think?

GVS: Keep your eyes open for it.

JF: What kind of movie do you think it could be?

GVS: I’ll have to think about that one.

JF: IF you have an idea and it’s like me and Zac playing basketball or delivering pizzas or whatever, I’m in.

If James Franco is in it, I’ll watch. Throw in a little Zac Efron for spice. I’ll take him as a pizza boy, methinks he likes his with pepperoni…

Deliveries in rear.

Te quiero papi chulo

The internets are abuzz with the rumor that one of Anderson Cooper’s ex boyfrients, 23 y/o J.D. Ordonez from Miami, Florida is part of the new “Real World: Brooklyn” that was currently filming in NYC this summer. Allegedly, Ordonez dated Cooper for two months around March and April before they broke up. It was reported in April, but nothing came of it…until now. The same J.D. Ordonez is a cast member of “Real World Brooklyn”! Here’s a leaked pic of all cast members:

Image: Vevmo

Looks like the same boy to me. Rumors that Anderson “takes it up the pooper” Cooper have been rampant for years. Many NYC blogs have reported that he is indeed gay with a hunkering for hunky latino boys. It looks like J.D. fits that bill. The “dolphin trainer” and “bartender” posted this on his myspace:

I’ve been the party boy but seem to have out grown that phase a bit, but I still like to hang out with friends and have a kick ass time… I’m proud of what I’ve achieved and enjoy the compliments humbly. I realize that beauty is only skin deep and it fades FAST. I try to keep that in mind and work to be a better man from the inside out as I get older..

I’d say this hair is pretty criminal

Kanye West was arrested this afternoon at LAX airport. After being videotaped by paparazzi videographers with press passes, the petulant rapper got annoyed and assaulted them. He took their digital camera, smashed it on the ground ad then lunged at the photographer screaming “Give me the camera! Give me the camera!” Then he asked if they were taping, and wanted the video, “Give me the fucking videotape!!” Police had to restrain him and then arrested him for felony vandalism. Who knew that vandelism could be a felony??

Bitch please. You know Kanye is just crying out for some attention (again). Well, congrats, now you’ll have some street cred that you so desperately deire. This is the most punk ass way to get arrested. Kudos. TMZ is said to soon be getting the actual footage. I can’t wait! Actually, I can. I’m not surprised in the least that Kanye is acting a fool. It’s pretty much par for the course for him. He’d probably throw a hissy fit if no one was noticing her midget ass.